State Police Investigate Suspicious Death in Cicero
Market Me: Cast a Smaller Net to Find Work
By Laura Allen
Looking for work? Try casting a smaller, more local net. Many job seekers think the best way to find a job is by casting the widest possible net. They spend hours each day online searching for a job—ANY job—that they can do. The problem with this strategy is that everyone else is dong this too. The result? Hiring managers are overwhelmed with a flood of resumes and many of those resumes are not a good match for the job that’s available. When the economy is tough, people want to cast the widest possible net into a vast sea of jobs.
A more effective approach is to start to cast a smaller net in your local pond. Take a look at the places you go in your daily life. You might go to the grocery store, a restaurant, the local hardware store—and even on rare occasions—places like the hospital.
What do you notice about these places? Do they have more employees than they need? Or are they constantly busy and might need some extra help in the near future. Do you know anyone who works at any of the places you frequent? Do they like their job or are they just doing it for the moment until they find something better? Get curious about the people you meet in your everyday encounters.
For example, say you are making a trip to the local Big Chain Superstore. Is there one particular cashier who is always friendly and outgoing? Make it a point to stand in her checkout aisle. Is she wearing a nametag? (Probably!) Make it a point to remember her name and strike up a quick conversation the next time you go there. Something simple like, “Hey Julie, I notice you are busy, but you always have a smile on your face. How do you stay so positive?” Be genuine. Start getting to know the people who serve you everyday. They have friends who have friends who have….you get the idea.
You might be thinking, “This all sounds great but I really don’t have time to make new friends, I need to find a job TODAY.”
Believe it or not, the system of casting a small net is likely to land you an opportunity faster than sending thousands of resumes into the internet abyss. Employers like to hire people who are a “known quantity” so they will often ask their current employees if they know someone to fill an opening. The employer will do this first, before they put an ad in a newspaper or post the ad online.
The more people you know in your local community, the better.
When you show a sincere interest in every person you meet, you start making a positive impression on all of the people around you. Then, when you are standing in Julie’s line at the Big Chain Superstore for the 10th time, she may ask you a little bit about YOU. When Julie does ask about you—and this point is very important—you are not going to ask her if her company is hiring or tell her you are looking for a job, you are going to tell her something much more compelling. We’ll talk about what that is and how to do it in the next column. Until then, happy job hunting!
Editor’s note: Laura Allen is a career coach and sales and marketing expert. The Oneida High School graduate has a BA in writing from Eugene Lang College. In 2002, she co-founded 15SecondPitch.com, a company dedicated to helping individuals market themselves more effectively. She’s been featured on NY1 News’ “Employment Report” and ABC News. She’s also been written about in The Wall Street Journal, Time Out, New York and Adweek.
Market Me: Cast a Smaller Net to Find Work
By Laura Allen
Looking for work? Try casting a smaller, more local net. Many job seekers think the best way to find a job is by casting the widest possible net. They spend hours each day online searching for a job—ANY job—that they can do. The problem with this strategy is that everyone else is dong this too. The result? Hiring managers are overwhelmed with a flood of resumes and many of those resumes are not a good match for the job that’s available. When the economy is tough, people want to cast the widest possible net into a vast sea of jobs.
A more effective approach is to start to cast a smaller net in your local pond. Take a look at the places you go in your daily life. You might go to the grocery store, a restaurant, the local hardware store—and even on rare occasions—places like the hospital.
What do you notice about these places? Do they have more employees than they need? Or are they constantly busy and might need some extra help in the near future. Do you know anyone who works at any of the places you frequent? Do they like their job or are they just doing it for the moment until they find something better? Get curious about the people you meet in your everyday encounters.
For example, say you are making a trip to the local Big Chain Superstore. Is there one particular cashier who is always friendly and outgoing? Make it a point to stand in her checkout aisle. Is she wearing a nametag? (Probably!) Make it a point to remember her name and strike up a quick conversation the next time you go there. Something simple like, “Hey Julie, I notice you are busy, but you always have a smile on your face. How do you stay so positive?” Be genuine. Start getting to know the people who serve you everyday. They have friends who have friends who have….you get the idea.
You might be thinking, “This all sounds great but I really don’t have time to make new friends, I need to find a job TODAY.”
Believe it or not, the system of casting a small net is likely to land you an opportunity faster than sending thousands of resumes into the internet abyss. Employers like to hire people who are a “known quantity” so they will often ask their current employees if they know someone to fill an opening. The employer will do this first, before they put an ad in a newspaper or post the ad online.
The more people you know in your local community, the better.
When you show a sincere interest in every person you meet, you start making a positive impression on all of the people around you. Then, when you are standing in Julie’s line at the Big Chain Superstore for the 10th time, she may ask you a little bit about YOU. When Julie does ask about you—and this point is very important—you are not going to ask her if her company is hiring or tell her you are looking for a job, you are going to tell her something much more compelling. We’ll talk about what that is and how to do it in the next column. Until then, happy job hunting!
Editor’s note: Laura Allen is a career coach and sales and marketing expert. The Oneida High School graduate has a BA in writing from Eugene Lang College. In 2002, she co-founded 15SecondPitch.com, a company dedicated to helping individuals market themselves more effectively. She’s been featured on NY1 News’ “Employment Report” and ABC News. She’s also been written about in The Wall Street Journal, Time Out, New York and Adweek.
Market Me: Cast a Smaller Net to Find Work
By Laura Allen
Looking for work? Try casting a smaller, more local net. Many job seekers think the best way to find a job is by casting the widest possible net. They spend hours each day online searching for a job—ANY job—that they can do. The problem with this strategy is that everyone else is dong this too. The result? Hiring managers are overwhelmed with a flood of resumes and many of those resumes are not a good match for the job that’s available. When the economy is tough, people want to cast the widest possible net into a vast sea of jobs.
A more effective approach is to start to cast a smaller net in your local pond. Take a look at the places you go in your daily life. You might go to the grocery store, a restaurant, the local hardware store—and even on rare occasions—places like the hospital.
What do you notice about these places? Do they have more employees than they need? Or are they constantly busy and might need some extra help in the near future. Do you know anyone who works at any of the places you frequent? Do they like their job or are they just doing it for the moment until they find something better? Get curious about the people you meet in your everyday encounters.
For example, say you are making a trip to the local Big Chain Superstore. Is there one particular cashier who is always friendly and outgoing? Make it a point to stand in her checkout aisle. Is she wearing a nametag? (Probably!) Make it a point to remember her name and strike up a quick conversation the next time you go there. Something simple like, “Hey Julie, I notice you are busy, but you always have a smile on your face. How do you stay so positive?” Be genuine. Start getting to know the people who serve you everyday. They have friends who have friends who have….you get the idea.
You might be thinking, “This all sounds great but I really don’t have time to make new friends, I need to find a job TODAY.”
Believe it or not, the system of casting a small net is likely to land you an opportunity faster than sending thousands of resumes into the internet abyss. Employers like to hire people who are a “known quantity” so they will often ask their current employees if they know someone to fill an opening. The employer will do this first, before they put an ad in a newspaper or post the ad online.
The more people you know in your local community, the better.
When you show a sincere interest in every person you meet, you start making a positive impression on all of the people around you. Then, when you are standing in Julie’s line at the Big Chain Superstore for the 10th time, she may ask you a little bit about YOU. When Julie does ask about you—and this point is very important—you are not going to ask her if her company is hiring or tell her you are looking for a job, you are going to tell her something much more compelling. We’ll talk about what that is and how to do it in the next column. Until then, happy job hunting!
Editor’s note: Laura Allen is a career coach and sales and marketing expert. The Oneida High School graduate has a BA in writing from Eugene Lang College. In 2002, she co-founded 15SecondPitch.com, a company dedicated to helping individuals market themselves more effectively. She’s been featured on NY1 News’ “Employment Report” and ABC News. She’s also been written about in The Wall Street Journal, Time Out, New York and Adweek.
Tips On Talking It Out
Many of the requests often received by dear “so-n-so” columns are often problems that need to be “talked out.”
Let’s get real on some things……look at your problem/situation in the face. Did you do anything to cause it? If so, then perhaps an apology is an order. Let’s look at some inappropriate ways to apologize……….
Do Not…..
1. yell “SORRY” and stamper off like a little kid.
2. place blame on the other person. (For example…I am sorry you made me do it.)
3. call names. (For example….I apologize that you’re an idiot).
4. apologize for the person’s feelings. (For example, I am sorry you were disappointed.)
5. have an emotional thrust…the crying, yelling etc…Take some time, wait awhile if you need to in order to have a composed discussion.
People need to talk things out. That is a number ONE problem!….We often can’t! Ya see, what often happens is that we don’t like to listen to the other side, but Man, we want to be heard! So some people drive off in cars, swear, break dishes, cry and scream…whatever… so they can be heard! Ridiculous! It’s time to change to a people of self-control. We should have calmness and politeness, and we need to care about others…enough to listen with our hearts. We often listen to words and try to form a defense immediately, instead of saying we’re sorry and meaning it. We need to apologize to set ourselves free from defending wrong or hurt and to set others free from hurt and injustice…..
It is alright to take some time away from the person. After all, you just had an argument of some sort. Let them know if you can. Say something like, “I can’t talk about this right now. I just need some time.” You can also add a time for that person to call you, or when you will call them. Really “get to the heart” apologies should be done face to face if possible, (when both people are ready). You can see the person’s reactions, body language etc. and often follow that if need be; for example there may be a misunderstanding and you’ll be able to see that in their facial expressions.
Furthermore an apology should be “I am sorry for (action you did or something you said). Please forgive me. I didn’t intend to hurt you.” If you did intend to hurt the person (and at times we do), then at the end say, “I did it because……..(fill in) I was angry (for example), and that’s a shallow reason, and I am so sorry.” That’s a great apology. One with guts that takes ownership of the wrong-doing.
For example: “Jack, I am sorry for yelling at you and calling you a jerk. I was over-emotional and did not intend to hurt you. I know I really need to get control over these emotions, so I can calm down and talk out our problems. Please forgive me.”
Sometimes it isn’t easy, but don’t sit around and analyze your apology…”just do it.” I recently apologized for something I thought was so ridiculous for the offender to be upset about. Not only did I think it was ridiculous; but I also thought I was RIGHT about the situation at hand…even after we talked the details out. However, I did NOT tell the person I felt that way. I just apologized with heartfelt sincerity. Why? And did I lie?
Firstly, I didn’t lie….I wanted the person to be set free from hurt. And yes it was a true “gutsy” apology like the one above. There was a part of my brain saying, What are you doing, Reva? This is nuts?” But, my heart said, “I hurt her, no matter how trivial I think it is. She’s in pain over this, and our relationship will not be the same until she knows my heart wants peace too” So, really it is about laying down our pride, at times, for the ability to have PEACE!
I know people who have held grudges for years….Why do people do that? Because they are RIGHT! There may be other ‘things” at hand, like money, or valuable items (whether it’s monetary or sentimental.) But those things in life will pass away….money is gone in a heartbeat and items, get lost, broken, etc. Let’s face it. PRIDE holds us back. We want to be right AND we want the other party to ACKNOWLEDGE that we are right! (Dang! wouldn’t that be nice.) Normally that doesn’t happen, so we stay angry and sever our relationship for years.
Receiving an apology is usually much easier than giving one. We usually say that we accept the person’s apology after talking it out and go on with life. In severe situations we may not go on in life with that person as a friend or in our lives. Believe it or not….that’s okay too. I have a friend whose ex-husband had cheated on her many times. How many times can she forgive that? Her mind always wondering who he’s with. None-the-less, how many STDs will she have or even knowing she could contract AIDS. The list goes on. I think the best way to put it is use your own judgment. If you are constantly being hurt by someone, you may be in more serious danger….don’t engage with them any more.
That’s all for now. Enjoy your week.
~Reva
Reva is a graduate of SUNY Potsdam with a bachelors degrees in psychology and education. She’s also a graduate of SUNY Cortland with a masters degree in education. Reva has worked many years as an educator and gives very practical advice.
If you have a question for Reva, email her at reva@m3ppublications.com
Tips On Talking It Out
Many of the requests often received by dear “so-n-so” columns are often problems that need to be “talked out.”
Let’s get real on some things……look at your problem/situation in the face. Did you do anything to cause it? If so, then perhaps an apology is an order. Let’s look at some inappropriate ways to apologize……….
Do Not…..
1. yell “SORRY” and stamper off like a little kid.
2. place blame on the other person. (For example…I am sorry you made me do it.)
3. call names. (For example….I apologize that you’re an idiot).
4. apologize for the person’s feelings. (For example, I am sorry you were disappointed.)
5. have an emotional thrust…the crying, yelling etc…Take some time, wait awhile if you need to in order to have a composed discussion.
People need to talk things out. That is a number ONE problem!….We often can’t! Ya see, what often happens is that we don’t like to listen to the other side, but Man, we want to be heard! So some people drive off in cars, swear, break dishes, cry and scream…whatever… so they can be heard! Ridiculous! It’s time to change to a people of self-control. We should have calmness and politeness, and we need to care about others…enough to listen with our hearts. We often listen to words and try to form a defense immediately, instead of saying we’re sorry and meaning it. We need to apologize to set ourselves free from defending wrong or hurt and to set others free from hurt and injustice…..
It is alright to take some time away from the person. After all, you just had an argument of some sort. Let them know if you can. Say something like, “I can’t talk about this right now. I just need some time.” You can also add a time for that person to call you, or when you will call them. Really “get to the heart” apologies should be done face to face if possible, (when both people are ready). You can see the person’s reactions, body language etc. and often follow that if need be; for example there may be a misunderstanding and you’ll be able to see that in their facial expressions.
Furthermore an apology should be “I am sorry for (action you did or something you said). Please forgive me. I didn’t intend to hurt you.” If you did intend to hurt the person (and at times we do), then at the end say, “I did it because……..(fill in) I was angry (for example), and that’s a shallow reason, and I am so sorry.” That’s a great apology. One with guts that takes ownership of the wrong-doing.
For example: “Jack, I am sorry for yelling at you and calling you a jerk. I was over-emotional and did not intend to hurt you. I know I really need to get control over these emotions, so I can calm down and talk out our problems. Please forgive me.”
Sometimes it isn’t easy, but don’t sit around and analyze your apology…”just do it.” I recently apologized for something I thought was so ridiculous for the offender to be upset about. Not only did I think it was ridiculous; but I also thought I was RIGHT about the situation at hand…even after we talked the details out. However, I did NOT tell the person I felt that way. I just apologized with heartfelt sincerity. Why? And did I lie?
Firstly, I didn’t lie….I wanted the person to be set free from hurt. And yes it was a true “gutsy” apology like the one above. There was a part of my brain saying, What are you doing, Reva? This is nuts?” But, my heart said, “I hurt her, no matter how trivial I think it is. She’s in pain over this, and our relationship will not be the same until she knows my heart wants peace too” So, really it is about laying down our pride, at times, for the ability to have PEACE!
I know people who have held grudges for years….Why do people do that? Because they are RIGHT! There may be other ‘things” at hand, like money, or valuable items (whether it’s monetary or sentimental.) But those things in life will pass away….money is gone in a heartbeat and items, get lost, broken, etc. Let’s face it. PRIDE holds us back. We want to be right AND we want the other party to ACKNOWLEDGE that we are right! (Dang! wouldn’t that be nice.) Normally that doesn’t happen, so we stay angry and sever our relationship for years.
Receiving an apology is usually much easier than giving one. We usually say that we accept the person’s apology after talking it out and go on with life. In severe situations we may not go on in life with that person as a friend or in our lives. Believe it or not….that’s okay too. I have a friend whose ex-husband had cheated on her many times. How many times can she forgive that? Her mind always wondering who he’s with. None-the-less, how many STDs will she have or even knowing she could contract AIDS. The list goes on. I think the best way to put it is use your own judgment. If you are constantly being hurt by someone, you may be in more serious danger….don’t engage with them any more.
That’s all for now. Enjoy your week.
~Reva
Reva is a graduate of SUNY Potsdam with a bachelors degrees in psychology and education. She’s also a graduate of SUNY Cortland with a masters degree in education. Reva has worked many years as an educator and gives very practical advice.
If you have a question for Reva, email her at reva@m3ppublications.com
Tips On Talking It Out
Many of the requests often received by dear “so-n-so” columns are often problems that need to be “talked out.”
Let’s get real on some things……look at your problem/situation in the face. Did you do anything to cause it? If so, then perhaps an apology is an order. Let’s look at some inappropriate ways to apologize……….
Do Not…..
1. yell “SORRY” and stamper off like a little kid.
2. place blame on the other person. (For example…I am sorry you made me do it.)
3. call names. (For example….I apologize that you’re an idiot).
4. apologize for the person’s feelings. (For example, I am sorry you were disappointed.)
5. have an emotional thrust…the crying, yelling etc…Take some time, wait awhile if you need to in order to have a composed discussion.
People need to talk things out. That is a number ONE problem!….We often can’t! Ya see, what often happens is that we don’t like to listen to the other side, but Man, we want to be heard! So some people drive off in cars, swear, break dishes, cry and scream…whatever… so they can be heard! Ridiculous! It’s time to change to a people of self-control. We should have calmness and politeness, and we need to care about others…enough to listen with our hearts. We often listen to words and try to form a defense immediately, instead of saying we’re sorry and meaning it. We need to apologize to set ourselves free from defending wrong or hurt and to set others free from hurt and injustice…..
It is alright to take some time away from the person. After all, you just had an argument of some sort. Let them know if you can. Say something like, “I can’t talk about this right now. I just need some time.” You can also add a time for that person to call you, or when you will call them. Really “get to the heart” apologies should be done face to face if possible, (when both people are ready). You can see the person’s reactions, body language etc. and often follow that if need be; for example there may be a misunderstanding and you’ll be able to see that in their facial expressions.
Furthermore an apology should be “I am sorry for (action you did or something you said). Please forgive me. I didn’t intend to hurt you.” If you did intend to hurt the person (and at times we do), then at the end say, “I did it because……..(fill in) I was angry (for example), and that’s a shallow reason, and I am so sorry.” That’s a great apology. One with guts that takes ownership of the wrong-doing.
For example: “Jack, I am sorry for yelling at you and calling you a jerk. I was over-emotional and did not intend to hurt you. I know I really need to get control over these emotions, so I can calm down and talk out our problems. Please forgive me.”
Sometimes it isn’t easy, but don’t sit around and analyze your apology…”just do it.” I recently apologized for something I thought was so ridiculous for the offender to be upset about. Not only did I think it was ridiculous; but I also thought I was RIGHT about the situation at hand…even after we talked the details out. However, I did NOT tell the person I felt that way. I just apologized with heartfelt sincerity. Why? And did I lie?
Firstly, I didn’t lie….I wanted the person to be set free from hurt. And yes it was a true “gutsy” apology like the one above. There was a part of my brain saying, What are you doing, Reva? This is nuts?” But, my heart said, “I hurt her, no matter how trivial I think it is. She’s in pain over this, and our relationship will not be the same until she knows my heart wants peace too” So, really it is about laying down our pride, at times, for the ability to have PEACE!
I know people who have held grudges for years….Why do people do that? Because they are RIGHT! There may be other ‘things” at hand, like money, or valuable items (whether it’s monetary or sentimental.) But those things in life will pass away….money is gone in a heartbeat and items, get lost, broken, etc. Let’s face it. PRIDE holds us back. We want to be right AND we want the other party to ACKNOWLEDGE that we are right! (Dang! wouldn’t that be nice.) Normally that doesn’t happen, so we stay angry and sever our relationship for years.
Receiving an apology is usually much easier than giving one. We usually say that we accept the person’s apology after talking it out and go on with life. In severe situations we may not go on in life with that person as a friend or in our lives. Believe it or not….that’s okay too. I have a friend whose ex-husband had cheated on her many times. How many times can she forgive that? Her mind always wondering who he’s with. None-the-less, how many STDs will she have or even knowing she could contract AIDS. The list goes on. I think the best way to put it is use your own judgment. If you are constantly being hurt by someone, you may be in more serious danger….don’t engage with them any more.
That’s all for now. Enjoy your week.
~Reva
Reva is a graduate of SUNY Potsdam with a bachelors degrees in psychology and education. She’s also a graduate of SUNY Cortland with a masters degree in education. Reva has worked many years as an educator and gives very practical advice.
If you have a question for Reva, email her at reva@m3ppublications.com
Manlius Resident Earns USC Degree
Manlius Resident Earns USC Degree
